Some medical chuckles

Here are a couple more chuckles for the day:

True stories:

At the beginning of his shift the Dr. placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient’s anterior chest wall. “Big breaths”, he instructed. “Well, they USED to be” replied the patient.

One more:

Dr. in Manitoba Canada: One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I had told a wife that her husband had died of a massive cardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a “massive internal fart”.

MCW- so glad you’re enjoying these. I’ve got lots of them. Many friends have e-mailed them to me over the years. Hope some more people will enjoy them tomorrow!

In the meantime:

A man comes into the ER and yells “My wife is going to have her baby in the cab!” I (the Dr.) grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady’s dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed there were several cabs—and I was in the wrong one!!!!

I’ll try to add a few each day. Not all medical chuckles, but chuckles and other useful information.

This is sort of a northern joke, you’ll see why after you read it:

As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up, jumps out of her car, runs to his truck and knocks on the window. He rolls down the window and she says “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load.” He ignores her and proceeds down the street.

When the truck stops for anothr red light, the girl catches up again, jumps out of her car , runs up and knocks on the window. Again the trucker lowers the window. As if they’d never spoken, the blond says brightly “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load!” Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street.

At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, she gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the window and the trucker again lowers the window. Again, she says “Hi, my name is Heather and you’re losing some of your load!”

When the light turns green, the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck and runs back to the blonde’s car, knocks on her window and as she lowers it he says…

“Hi, my name is Kevin, it’s winter in Michigan and I’m driving a SALT TRUCK!”